May 4th!

24th birthday

Today, I turned 24 years old at 11:11am (thanks mom for keeping great records lol)! Praise the Lord for the blessing of seeing another year!!! As I wrote on Facebook today, this year has been so eventful for me already! I am currently in my second trimester and couldn’t be more excited about starting a family! What a huge change in my life!! Children are absolutely a blessing from the Lord and I’m grateful to be growing one in my belly. I am thankful that He has given me the ability to conceive. I don’t take it lightly.

There are so many things on my mind today. One being that I can’t believe my birthday is already here. Wasn’t it just December???

This birthday is much different than any of my previous birthdays. On this day, I feel more mature than ever before. I feel very aware of my current circumstances and where my life is headed (according to what the Lord has been showing me). I am very content with where I am, which is new for me. Even though I’m excited about what lies ahead, I do wonder how things will turn out. Good? Bad? Sad? I don’t know. BUT, Instead of thinking negatively, I will hold my head up and thank the Lord because He is my guide and my Father. My Father tells me not to walk in fear but victory! My God and Father tells me to not be anxious! I am learning to walk as the Lord has called me to and I am learning to be thankful in all things. Here is to year 24 in my young life!!!!!!

I can’t express all of the thanks I have in my heart for the folks in my life. Jesus showed out in giving me a wonderful support system through friends, family, co-workers, etc. He IS faithful and consistent.

Thanks for reading! 🙂

 

 

Birth is Beautiful

Birth. What are my thoughts on birth? Well, I know that we have an awesome Creator who made women and their bodies to birth babies if they choose to. From puberty to menopause (with birthing babies in between) our bodies endure and experience some incredible changes. Most women (maybe all at first??) are afraid of giving birth- whether by cesarean section, natural birth, or birth with interventions. Birth IS a scary thing, especially when you’ve never done it before or if you don’t know much about the process. I recently learned that there is no 1 way to give birth. This means that I have options. Women have options!

Knowing that more than one option is available when it comes to giving birth provides comfort for women who have fears about giving birth. Women need to know that they have options and a say-so in their pregnancy and labor process. As I mentioned earlier, our bodies (women) were specially created for the birthing process. Our bodies stretch, open, and make any necessary adjustments it needs to when we grow and birth a baby. We won’t break in half or burst! We might tear, bleed, ache, and definitely hurt. However, labor should be embraced and respected as a natural ability instead of looked down on as an illness that needs correction. AND, it should certainly not be seen as a medical or surgical procedure unless it is absolutely necessary (I understand there are exceptions that should be respected). God made our bodies to do what they need to in this process!! Isn’t that wonderful?? ❤

I am a first-time mom and currently pregnant with a fetus the size of a lemon (today!!!). I am excited, nervous, scared, and aware. I am excited to successfully give birth to my first child and see him or her for the first time! I am nervous about not feeling strong enough to deliver my baby. I am scared that something will go wrong during labor. And, I am aware that labor is a hard process, a painful process, but also a life changing process. I will not let my fears take over. I will conquer them and be as confident as I can be, even through surrendering to the pain of labor to allow the baby to be born. I don’t know all there is to know about this stuff, but I am learning all that I can to make the BEST decision for me and my baby. Birth is beautiful and intimate and I want my experience to be so.

“It is in the surrender that the process and progress happen.” – The Essential Homebirth Guide

Asking the Lord for peace and wisdom through this entire process. Pray for us 🙂

Thanks for reading! 🙂

I’m Pregnant!

YES! You read correctly. My husband and I are expecting our first child! We are sooo excited and nervous about this. We are still newlyweds so this is pretty much a honeymoon babe (though, not quite). As hard as it may seem for some, this was planned. Hubby and I discussed this before we got engaged. We knew where our hearts were and we knew what we wanted. And, well, the Lord provided! 🙂

In preparation for growing, birthing, and raising a human person, I am doing all of the research I can to be as ready as I can- though I firmly believe that no one can be completely ready to birth and raise a child. First thing’s first: I gots to be more active. I am planning to have an all-natural birth and, Lord willing, a home birth. Because I chose this route, there are things that I can do to make the experience better for me and baby. Painless? Nope! Easy? Nope. But better than if I were not doing these things. These things include finding a midwife, someone I can grow to love and trust up until (and after) our baby is born. Next, I have to learn about this birthing process and what entails having a child at home. Sounds lovely but there are many questions I need to ask. On top of everything, I really want a good support system; good people in my corner. My husband rocks and soon I will find a midwife who does too. Along with the midwife comes my family and friends. Hopefully, those who have supported me up to this point will continue with me. The good support system will be there to help me throughout my child’s entire life.

 

Well, let’s do this thing! I am so glad you all will be with me for this ride. Look out for my next post that shares some of my very real thoughts about birth.

On “Background”

This piece was birthed out of thoughts and feelings I’ve been having lately. I love being Black. I want to be seen as a Black Woman. Since dating my now husband Ben, I’ve been a part of many dialogues about Black men with “snow bunnies,” Black women and self-hate, interracial relationships, etc. I wonder about teaching my children and passing culture down to them, and the fact that I can’t trace back my African roots saddens me.

This poem gives more insight to my background and experiences. Those of an unapologetically Black Christian woman married to a wonderful white man. I want my white friends and family to hear me and understand me (or at least make an effort to). I want my differences embraced by all. I don’t want assumptions made about me by outsiders or insiders. I do have strong opinions about a lot of things. Don’t assume where I stand on a topic. Ask me.

This poem is me opening up to the world in my own way.

I want to also mention that I was very content writing this. Not angry or frustrated. I’ve felt angry and frustrated about these things at some point in my young life, but the Lord has blessed me to be content and appreciative of who I am. Who He made me to be…family, skin color and all. Praise the Lord for our different backgrounds and experiences!!

Any questions/comments? Just ask! 🙂

Background

I have light skin and kinky hair

I cannot trace my roots back to Africa

My maternal grandmother is from the deep South

My maternal grandfather is from the North

My great-grandmother was Native American (God rest her soul)

I never met my great-grandfather who gave me my Irish maiden name

He was Black

I am from Detroit

People tell me that I’m not “actually” from Detroit or I don’t “seem like” I’m from there….meaning what?

I attended a Predominantly White Institution for undergrad

I speak my Black vernacular and the language of wider communication the same

I am an unapologetically Black Woman married to a white man who is blonde with blue eyes- half Norwegian, half Irish

I am a Black Christian among many white conservative Christians…many of them like trump. I think he’s awful

I believe and support Black Lives Matter

I have friends and family who say all lives matter

Most times I feel like I belong

Other times, I feel the need to defend

I am a lover of all people

I am complex due to my complex background

I am unique

I am made in the image of God

I AM Black

I am me.

You Wouldn’t Believe This!

OH MY WORD!!!!!

Have you ever heard of drain flies? They’re not gnats or fruit flies. They are also known as moth flies. They are about double the size of a moth with fuzzy bodies and big dumbo wings. Yeah, sounds gross. They don’t bite (hallelujah!!!) but they are INCREDIBLY annoying, seem to pop up out of the blue, and if you see two, there’s probably 100 more where they came from. Today, I killed 7 in the morning (the actual number is probably more). So, we have an infestation. These flies hang out in old, clogged pipes. So, it has little to do with cleanliness. If you know me, you know that I hate all things bugs. They discuss me…especially bugs that seem to COME OUT OF NOWHERE. Jesus!! Help!! I feel like I’m going nuts over here! My husband never sees the flies, so he thinks it’s in my head! “Baaaaaabbbeee! I promise I’m not crazy” were my exact words to him a few nights ago. So what we gone do about this?

I’ve been doing a lot of research these last 24 hours and have discovered that they are in fact real, and there is no way to get rid of them except to burn your house down……………………………………………………..just kidding lol!! There is a solution!!!!!!!!!! The drains need to be physically cleaned. That includes doing the following:

  • Use a pipe brush and a plumbing snake to get rid of the breeding grounds (yuck!)
  • Using gel cleaner behind that to get the rest of the organic matter out (organic matter??)
  • Use a plunger to get the rest of the matter out of there (what in the…?!?!?)

Bruh, who bout to do all dat? Not I, said the DRAIN fly!!

Shout out to awesome landlords who care though! I was going to try to fix this issue on my own, but then I decided that I couldn’t. My mother and mother-in-law helped me make that decision. So, I sent my landlord a message and she got right on it! You da best!!

 

Stay tuned to read about what happens next!!

 

Until next time…

 

-Bjorlie

Real Talk- Happy Black History Month!

Hey guys! So, imma keep this post real short. In the spirit of Black History Month (yes, we still got 8 more days y’all!!), I want to express my love and appreciation for my first language, African-American Vernacular English (AAVE). For all of my uninformed friends, this is not slang. AAVE is a beautiful variation of English that has traveled from West Africa to America during the slave trade. It is more than a variation of English spoken by Black people in the South, but it is one spoken by most Blacks. It is a dialect, some would call it, of English that has rules and structures just like other languages. In my linguistics studies, Dr. Geneva Smitherman has been someone I have admired because of her work in this area. Wikipedia tells us that Dr. Smitherman “is a Distinguished Professor Emerita of English and Director of the African American Language and Literacy Program at Michigan State University.” Show you right!!! She has done great work and has many books on this topic, including:

  • Talkin and Testifyin
  • Black Talk
  • Articulate While Black
  • Talkin that Talk…..and more

Understanding Black English (another way to call it) as a true dialect/variation of English helped me to feel better about who I am as a Black, educated woman who was raised speaking AAVE. Don’t get me wrong, I still gotta code switch cuz’ people be trippin when I use phrases they don’t understand. We proly be thinkin “read a book…dang!” about each other hahaha!

I will have more posts in the future about AAVE, but I will end this one here. Next time, I’ll even include some examples to help out my uninformed peeps.  Readers, I encourage you to please do some research on this topic. It is very interesting and will change your thinking about language (hopefully) and make you one step closer to being cultural competent. Dr. Geneva Smitherman is a perfect source to start with. Never stop learning y’all!! Happy reading and HAPPY BLACK HISTORY MONTH!!! 🙂

Journey!

Hello friends, family, and strangers! I am embarking on a journey today. It’s not quite a new one, but it is an exciting one! I am going to start writing again! YAY! I love to write and I want to share so many things with everyone through this amazing craft. This blog won’t have one particular focus, as my other blogs have had. Instead, I’ll be writing about whatever I want! I’ll share my thoughts on politics, Christianity, being in an interracial relationship, Black issues, loving people (etc, etc, etc, etc), and I may even publish some of my short stories on here. We will just have to see 🙂

Writing is something I have always loved and like dancing, it is something I constantly think of. I believe that’s for a reason. The Lord gives us gifts and it’s not fair to Him to do nothing with them. I could bring Him so much glory through my gift of dance and writing. I don’t how, but I’m tired of wondering “what if.” So, in the spirit of TRULY LIVING, I am launching this blog and hoping to become a better writer, thinker, speaker, communicator, and so much more.

Pray with me as I embark on this exciting journey. I also encourage you to use the gifts God gave you. You never know where they will take you. Don’t worry about not being “good enough” at first. You can only get better by exercising the craft/talent.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:9